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Our current “Family of God” sermon series is an opportunity for us to explore a number of related topics as we think through many of the different relationships that we find ourselves in. One of those important subjects is domestic violence and abuse.

In the past few years we have all become much more aware about the reality of the many ways that people can abuse their relationship partners. Not all abuse is physical, but it always involves the use of a form of power to harm someone else.

We’ll think a little more about some of this in next week’s sermon where we discuss marriage.

Anglicare have a number of very helpful resources available for us all to use Their webpage “Domestic violence support” has lots of useful information and reminds us of both reality of domestic violence and also the pathways we can take out of it.

Everyone has a right to feel safe. Especially in their own home. But if your partner or someone else you live with uses power and control to intimidate you and give you fear, you could be experiencing domestic violence.

Domestic violence can involve a range of controlling behaviours, some of which may be harder to spot because they don’t involve obvious physical abuse.

Anglicare takes matters of domestic violence very seriously.

If you think you (or someone you love) could be experiencing domestic violence, or you have concerns for your safety, help is available. Contact Anglicare Counselling on 1300 651 728 to book your confidential appointment today.

Signs of domestic violence

Living with someone who is abusive and violent can feel like walking on eggshells. If you are unsure whether what you or your loved one is experiencing is domestic violence, here are some common signs.

  • Your access to money is controlled, big financial decisions and purchases are made without you, or you have no say when it comes to household spending (financial abuse).
  • Religious beliefs or scriptures are misused to punish or control you, or you are forced to act in a way that is traumatic to you because of your faith or cultural beliefs (spiritual abuse).
  • You are told who you can see and when you can see them. You feel like you’ve been cut off from your friends, your family and your support network (social isolation).
  • You are constantly belittled, criticised and blamed (verbal and emotional abuse).
  • You, your children or your pets are threatened with harm in order to control you (psychological abuse).
  • You constantly fear for your safety because you’ve been hit, punched, choked, or injured by other violent behaviours in the past (physical abuses).
  • You are forced to perform sexual acts or sexual acts take place without your consent (sexual abuse).
  • Technology is used to stalk, harass or embarrass you (technology-facilitated abuse).

If you are living with domestic violence, it’s important that you remember that it is not your fault. Leaving a situation like this can be hard, especially when you are being controlled. You are not to blame for someone else’s behaviour.

The road to recovery from domestic abuse is not easy or straight-forward and there are many obstacles that can hinder your progress along the way. But if you want to begin that journey today, help is available for you.

You can always speak to one of your pastors about this topic, whether you are a victim of abuse or are worried about your own behaviour. We also strongly recommend Anglicare’s support services mentioned above.

In a church of our size we know that there will sadly be many people who are being mistreated in this way. Our task together is to speak clearly about it, to remove the shame that many people feel when they find themselves involved in abusive situations, and to work together towards the hopeful transformation that the risen Christ can provide in each painful situation.

David Ould
Senior Associate Minister

CLICK HERE FOR DOMESTIC VIOLENCE SUPPORT

 

Pray for the vulnerable and those suffering abuse

Give thanks that in his mercy, God cares deeply for the vulnerable and shines light into the darkest corners of our lives. Ask God for wisdom, courage, and compassion as his people speak openly about domestic violence and support those who are suffering. Ask God to bring healing to the broken, expose and restrain evil, and grow a church community marked by Christlike love, safety, and hope.